Technology features I do not understand

In the interest of being able to make my cousins think I'm cool, I've been attempting to stay current with the latest technology trends. It's easy enough to read about a new feature of something and say, "oh, that sounds great!" but I find it less great when the exciting new things your phone can do actually come into play.

Lots of devices now - iPhones, cell phones, mp3 players - are coming equipped with touch screens (Camera phones are apparently no longer en vogue, which is too bad, since I just finally got one). Generally, this means that you no longer have to spend the energy to push those pesky 1/8" deep buttons. According to some people I've spoken to, this is the best thing ever created on earth, better even than fire, sliced bread, and jelly doughnuts. Sadly, I don't see the thrill. Let's say that I have a new touch-screen cell phone, and I shove it in my pocket on my way out the door. Now, I've had non-touch-screen phones randomly call the first person in my address book (my friend Anthony) because their buttons have been pressed when the phone was in a bag with bulky things on top of it, or in a pocket where my jeans mashed the keys when I sat down (ths is why I now have a flip phone - to spare poor Anthony the phone calls of dead air or jingling keys). I dear this would happen with alarming frequency with a touch-screen cell phone. Let's say that I put said phone in my pocket after hanging up with talking to my sister. If the friction in my pocket hits the send key on the touch screen and calls her back, she may hear, "jeez, I never thought I'd get off the phone! Yak, yak, yak." And then she'd never talk to me again. Or perhaps it would call someone while in my bag... can you imagine hearing, "hello? HELLO?!" in a quiet movie theater? I have a friend who was once listening so intently to her voicemail, phone balenced between shoulder and ear while she copied down a phone number, that the touchscreen registered "delete" and the message that was so important was lost forever. I think I'll pass on that feature.

Also new is the trend to make things be able to be controlled with movement, as demonstrated with the Nintendo Wii controller. While fun for a game, this technology is now available in the new line of iPods - shake them, and your songs will shuffle! Fantastic, if you listen while sitting still. Forget about using them on a bus, while climbing stairs, or while working out.

The point is: Newer isn't necessarily better. Just because you can have an animated GIF of a sparkly toad dancing on your website doesn't mean you should. Not all things need touchscreens. And we, as a nation of consumers, need to stop glomming onto the hot new trend, since it may not be so wonderful after all.